DC Intern Diaries

I'm a female 24 year old DC permanent intern. You name it and I've probably interned it. I'm also a graduate student in DC.

Friday, June 17, 2005

The Perfect Man - Heather Locklear, Hillary Duff star in creepy movie

This is the WP movie review...how absolutely creepy that a teenage girl wrote her mother love letters and "romanced" her...for 8 months!....in the real world story, the daughter actually proposed to her mother!!...pretty sick...interesting how they turned a literal greek tragedy into a fluffy cutesy film with Hillary Duff and Heather Locklear!

"Based on the true story of Heather Robinson, who as a teenager invented an imaginary boyfriend for her single mom and conducted a romantic correspondence with her, "The Perfect Man" is creepy as heck. Not as creepy as the original story, to be sure, but creepy lite. Even Robinson, in an interview in Radar magazine, says she doesn't see how the film, starring the ever-insipid Hilary Duff as the 16-year-old daughter and Heather Locklear as her mother, could possibly be as dark as her own experience and subsequent temporary estrangementfrom her mother was. No, dark it is not. Try boring, however."

Monday, June 13, 2005

Cleary Gottlieb Summer Associate Story - Not True!!

I have a report from a reputable source....that the e-mail that's going around isn't true. A drunken associate from another firm PUSHED her into the river and had disappeared once the cops figured out what really happened. And she wasn't arrested - they just took her to the hospital to make sure that she
was okay.

How messed up!! Not only was this poor girl pushed into the Hudson River - but then she is disparaged and embarassed (and I have seen emails with her full name) and made into a joke by other NY summers! How cruel!

Cleary Gottlieb Summer Associate Story

BTW, she is apparently a pre-clerk summer from UVA Law...

FW: First summer associate catastrophe thus far....

I'm sure by now you have all heard the summer-associate most embarrasing-moments stories from past summer classes at your respective firms. See if you can beat this: the other night hundreds of new york summers, including myself, were at a very snooty charity benefit at Pier 60 in Chelsea Piers, put on by a bunch of law firms. Drinks were served in abundance, and it was only a matter of time before some summer associate with a low tolerance made an egregious social faux pas in front of the partners of their firm. What actually took place was better than any of us could have hoped for. In a drunken stupour, a girl from Cleary Gottlieb suggested to those standing around her that they all go for a swim (keep in mind that this was at a restaurant with a deck sitting over the Hudson River, and that once off the deck it was 500 feet back to shore in pretty rough swells of very polluted water). Everyone around looked at her as if she was joking, or crazy. Despite the fact that nobo
dy was willing to join her, she took off her shoes and dress and jumped half-naked into the River, causing, as you can imagine, widespread panic amongst everyone at the party. The coast guard was called in immediately and apparently she was arrested. One can only wonder if that is the sort of behavior that might prevent one from getting an offer at the end of the summer.

Wednesday, June 08, 2005

Washington, DC bars for older, more sophisticated interns

I was putting together this list for a fellow intern, who is older and married, downtown, so figured I would share....note this is different than a happy hour list - some of these places have no specials...

Palette
Panache
Mayflower
Round Robin
Mandarin Hotel bar
Helix
Bar Rouge
Topaz
Cloud
Sequioas or Tony and Joe's
Lights
Sky Terrace
Red Sage
Old Ebbitt Grill
Le Bar
Bobby Van's
Shelley's Backroom
15 Ria

Tuesday, June 07, 2005

Dear Alcohol

Dear Alcohol,

First & foremost, let me tell you that I'm a huge fan of yours. As my friend, you always seem to be there when needed. The perfect post-work cocktail, a beer at the game, and you're even around in the holidays, hidden inside chocolates as you warm us when we're stuck in the midst of endless family gatherings.
However, lately I've been wondering about your intentions. While
I want to believe that you have my best interests at heart, I feel that your influence has led to some unwise consequences:

1. Phone calls: While I agree with you that communication is important, I question the suggestion that any conversation of substance or necessity takes place after 2 a.m. Why would you make me call those ex-boyfriends/girlfriends when I know for a fact they do not want to hear from me during the day, let alone
all hours of the night?

2. Eating: Now, you know I love a good meal, b ut why do you suggest that I eat a taco with chili sauce, along with a big Italian meatball and some stale chips (washed down with WINE & topped off with a Kit Kat after a few cheese curls & white castles)? I'm an eclectic eater, but I think you went too far this time.

3. Clumsiness: Unless you're subtly trying to tell me that I need to do more yoga to improve my balance, I see NO need to hammer the issue home by causing me to fall down. It's completely unnecessary, and the black & blue marks that appear on my body mysteriously the next day are beyond me. Similarly, it should never take me more than 45 seconds to get the front door
key into the lock.

4. Furthermore: The hangovers have GOT to stop. This is getting ridiculous. I know a little penance for our previous evening's debauchery may be in order, but the 3pm hangover immobility is completely unacceptable. My entire day is shot . I ask that, if the proper precautions are taken (water, vitamin B, bread products, aspirin) prior to going to sleep/passing out face down on the kitchen floor with a bag of popcorn, the hangover should be minimal & in no way interfere with my daily activities.

5. The "hook-up." Need I say more?

Alcohol, I have enjoyed our friendship for some years now & would like to ensure that we remain on good terms. You've been
the invoker of great stories, the provocation for much laughter, and the needed companion when I just don't know what to do with the extra money in my pockets. In order to continue this
friendship, I ask that you carefully review my grievances above & address them immediately. I will look for an answer no later than Thursday 3pm (pre-happy hour) on your possible solutions & hopefully we can continue this fruitful partnership.

Thank you,
Your biggest fan

P.S. THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Innovative
2. Preliminary
3. Proliferation
4. Cinnamon

THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Specificity
2. British Constitution
3. Passive-aggressive disorder

THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN
DRUNK:
1. Thanks, but I don't want to have sex.
2. Nope, no more beer for me.
3. Sorry, but you're not really my type.
4. Good evening, officer. Isn't it lovely out tonight?
5. Oh, I couldn't. No one wants to hear me sing

Ann Coulter on dating in Washington, DC

From George Magazine...
By Ann Coulter

The really appropriate setting for writing an article about dating in
the nation's capital would be home alone in my D.C. apartment on a Saturday
night. By chance, however, I'll be in New York this weekend. By chance,
I've been in New York every weekend for approximately the previous 147 weeks,
give or take a few shuttle mishaps. But since all my stuff is in D.C., I
do have to drop in occasionally. Consequently, I've become a minor
authority on dating in Washington. Maybe not on dating exactly but one crucial
element of any date: "the ask."

Boys in Washington don't know how to ask for a date. What they do is try
to trick you into asking them for a date. They say, "I know you're really
busy, so call me when you'd like to go out to dinner" or "Call me when you're
back in Washington" or, my favorite, "Are we ever going to get together?"
What are you supposed to say to such completely insane things? I've never
figured that out, which is why these conversations tend to end in hostile
silences.

"Call me when you'd like to go out for dinner" isn't asking for a date;
it's asking me to ask you for a date. For male readers in Washington, asking
for a date entails these indispensable components: an express request for a
female's company on a particular date for a specific activity. Oh yes,
and the request has to be made to the female herself.

Roughly once every two weeks, I get a woman on my answering machine
asking me if I'd like to go out with some dumb-ass male friend of hers who's
too afraid to call me himself. (For those outside Washington, I'm not
kidding.)

This isn't a screeching, hate-filled, anti-male screed. It Is a
screeching, hate-filled anti-D.C. screed. There's no large sociological point about
relations between the sexes here. It's Washington. I know this, because
while D.C. males are on my answering machine with vague announcements
that they've called, I still get messages from boys in New York saying, for
example, "I have tickets for the opera next Friday. Would you like to
go?"

Males in every other city know how to ask for dates. So it's not me;
it's not feminism; it's not the millennium. I've begun aggressively inquiring
of every female I come across:"Pardon, but have you noticed that boys in
Washington don't know how to ask for dates?" The consistent response has
been a raft of stinging denunciations too numerous to catalog here. If I
were asking something preposterous, like "Say, have you noticed all the
alligator carcasses in the street lately?" I wouldn't be getting such
emphatic affirmations every time.

Recently, I asked a female on Capitol Hill about this, and she said
right off, as if I were a psychic, "We were just talking about that on
Saturday night!" She had been discussing it in a mixed crowd and reported that
the boys began hectoring the girls-C'mon, this is the twentieth century.
You're modern women; you can ask for dates. I asked her if waiting for women to
ask them for dates had worked for these guys. No, they just sit around with
friends, year after year, waiting for their theory to play out. This is
also how government programs are conceived and tested, so it makes perfect
sense that only in Washington are males still waiting for action on the no-ask
dating plan.

In fact, the incapacity of the D.C. male to request a date is the
perfect synecdoche for this whole pathetic city. There is a total absence of
normal civilized conventions in Washington. The customer is always wrong, the
cabs don't have meters, and complete strangers ask for the sports section of
your paper on the subway. In every real job I've ever had, it was a
convention for the boss to give a Christmas gift to the people who work for him. In
Washington, minimum-wage staffers take up a collection to buy Christmas
gifts for the senator and chief of staff.

There's a reason boys asking for dates is a convention of civilized
society. First, someone's going to have to face rejection. It may as well be the
aggressive, testosterone-pumping, hunter male. Speaking for myself, I'll
take 69 cents on the dollar (or whatever the current feminist myth is)
never to have to ask for a date. But the whole point of this convention is to
reduce, if not eliminate, the need for rejection anyway. The entire
dating system runs on implicit understandings. If the hunter male doesn't like
a girl, he doesn't call. That's the end of it. If the hunted female
doesn't like the boy, she's unavailable without a good excuse three times in a
row. No explanations, no hurt feelings. When you start fiddling with a
centuries-old system like this, you're just asking for trouble. If you
can't operate by covert signals, you're going to get horrifying,
misery-inducing explanations.

Second, no one makes any money in D.C. From this, I deduce
that young men should make loads of money. There may be grating aspects
to 20- and 30-somethings earning kazillion-dollar bonuses, but at least
wealth gives them the self-confidence to ask for a date. Third, TV is reality
in Washington. Restaurants close at 8 P.M. A few really, really late-night
places stay open until nine or 10, but even these sometimes close
unexpectedly at eight. (In addition to being always wrong, the customer
is an impediment to the serious business of Washington, which is watching
TV.) So everyone is home watching TV all the time. Like many New Yorkers, I
never had a TV, but I got one when I moved to Washington. The peculiar thing
about watching TV after a long lapse is that you are actually aware of TV
changing your perception of reality. I've started subconsciously associating men
of the cloth with murderous Nazi conspiracies, for example. I've got a
million more television-induced perception shifts, but the relevant one here is
that females are invariably the sexual aggressors on TV. The typical romantic
overture on the small screen is boy meets girl, girl drops dress.

TV hasn't ruined me yet, though. My romantic fantasy is still this: Girl meets
moving-company guy, girl moves back to New York.

Thursday, June 02, 2005

DC Intern Guide to DC Happy Hours

The Washington Post's intern guide sucks this year! Are they just lazy? Or completely ignorant of the fact that young 20-something interns might not go or would feel out of place at fancy, adult places like Mortons over somewhere like Lucky Bar or Tequila Grill?

So here's some intern-approriate happy hours that they missed:

Tequila Grill
Buffala Billiards
Lucky Bar
Rumors
Ozios
Karma
Cafe Citron
Front Page
The Tombs
Red River Grill

Not sure about specials, but cheaper anyway:

Adams Mill
Angry Inch
Madhatters
Politikis

Tuesday, May 31, 2005

to blog or not to blog?

I haven't blogged in a while. Between finals and working and moving from the suburbs, ie NoVA, into DC, I haven't had much time. But I'm back in DC, my second hometown where I lived for several years before moving to the land of Cheesecake Factories and Crate and Barrells, and I'm interning again this summer downtown in the K Street area. So maybe I will feel some inspiration to jot down my random thoughts...

Wednesday, January 19, 2005

Inaugural Food Part II

Swanky Benjamin Harrison served blue Point oysters on ice, sweetbread pate à la reine, breast of quail à la Ciceron, pâté de foie gras à la Harrison, terrine of game à la Morton and pyramid of nougat Renaissance. I can't even pronounce these names.

At President Bush's first inaugural, Bush served an assortment of seafood, lamb with red Swiss chard sauteed with cranberries, mushroom and corn souffle, and apple tart with cinnamon ice cream.

During this inaugural, guests at three Inaugural Balls at the MCI Center, to which donors of between $100,000 and $250,000 were invited, will dine on lobster medallions with orange and grapefruit sections, filet of beef tenderloin with asparagus, baby carrots, potatoes au gratin and Georgia peach crumble with vanilla ice cream. Just think, it only takes the cost of 1-2 Ivy League educations, 1-2 hummers, or 1/3 of a one bedroom condo in Adams Morgan to eat a meal you could get for a couple hundred bucks.

Some special inaugural treats:
Reagan: jelly beans (they invented the blue one for him!)
Clinton: brocooli
Coolidge: pickles

The sparest inaugural meal: vegetable soup and crackers served to Lyndon Baines Johnson aboard Air Force One.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A17547-2005Jan18_2.html

Snow day for everyone...but me

While my friends who work at nonprofits and lobbying shops and other varying DC places and at government agencies are going home between 1-3 pm, I am stuck here at work! Argh! Oh well, at least I have tomorrow off. Looking forward to going out tonight and partying! Hopefully it will have stopped snowing. (I hate weathermen - they are the worst type of men - because they are always wrong!)



Tuesday, January 18, 2005

Man Threatens to Blow up Van by White House Right Before Inauguaration; Creates Traffic

From the WP: A man who threatened to blow up a van a short distance from the White House waged a standoff with law enforcement authorities this evening, snarling downtown traffic for blocks and leading police to evacuate several blocks of downtown as a precaution. The man was upset about a family matter and the episode did not appear to be related to terrorism or Thursday's presidential inauguration....The incident began just before 4 p.m. at 15th Street and Pennsylvania Avenue NW. Police said the man, who was driving a cargo van, claimed to have 15 gallons of gasoline inside along with a triggering device.

This guy must be nuts. Who is stupid enough to do something like this when there are hundreds of snipers and armored vehicles and police and troops around????

Traffic today at 5pm downtown was just awful. It took me double time to get where I was going on. My cabbie was NOT happy about crossing town.

I used to intern at one of the buildings they evacuated. That must have been scary. They evacuated a few times when I worked there because of threats. It always freaked me out. I wasn't getting paid enough to deal with that stress.


Inaugural Party Food

When it comes to party food styles, they've ranged from simple under Carter ("peanuts and pretzels" balls with tickets costing no more than $25) to the hearty spread laid out for Buchanan's ball in 1857: 400 gallons of oysters, 500 quarts of chicken salad, 1,200 quarts of ice cream, 60 saddles of mutton, 8 rounds of beef, 75 hams and 125 tongues, plus $3,000 worth of wine -- about $63,000 worth today.

At the Palm, the lobbyist hangout and downtown landmark, the Long Island Iced Tea has been remade into the Capitol Iced Tea, with iced blue Curacao stars.

The menu for Wednesday's sold out prestigious Black Tie and Boots Ball:
Bartenders will serve Lone Star and Shiner Bock beer, among other drinks. The hotel is getting ready to feed 12,000 people during the ball, plus serve a sit-down, rib-eye steak dinner for 950. Buffet offerings will include southwestern Caesar salad (add jicama, spice up the dressing) and mesquite grilled jumbo shrimp (marinate in lime and cilantro, add chipotle) and Texas rice.


http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A6506-2005Jan13.html
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A10734-2005Jan14.html


Saturday, January 15, 2005

3rd Season Apprentice "Book Smart" Lawyers Not Impressive

They all attended T2-T4 law schools. I'm not too impressed. Basically anyone with a crappy GPA and LSAT score with a heartbeat can get into these law schools.

Alex - Seattle University of Law

Bren - University of Memphis Law

Erin - Villanova Law

After reading the "book smart" profiles, I think the lawyers are the least impressive, as lawyers and as possible corporate whatevers for the Trump organization. Jennifer was MUCH more impressive in both law and business. I really was expecting under "book smart" some Yalies, Harvard grads, Columbia, etc. No one even has an impressive undergrad. Is this to level the playing field with the non-bookies?



I'm glad we don't have royalty in this country

(CNN) -- Britain's Prince Harry has apologized for wearing a Nazi uniform to a party, admitting he made a bad choice and saying through his publicist, "I am very sorry if I caused any offense."

The apology was released on Wednesday by the Clarence House Press office: "I am very sorry if I caused any offense or embarrassment to anyone. It was a poor choice of costume and I apologize."

The press office said, "Prince Harry apologized tonight after he was pictured on the front page of The Sun newspaper in a Nazi soldier's uniform which he wore to a fancy dress party."

An image of the front page of Thursday's editions was released to the media late Wednesday.

A large headline reads, "Harry the Nazi."

Next to it stands the prince, who is wearing slacks and a short-sleeve shirt, both beige, with a red Nazi insignia on his left arm.

Prince Harry is third in line to the British throne after his father, Prince Charles, and his brother, Prince William.



Friday, January 14, 2005

DC Restaurant Week Review: Palette

Palette's bar area and drinks gets 5 stars. Soft lighting, nice colors, fresh red roses, large martini glasses. Not enough seats though. And the actual taste of the martinis was just so so. I would recommend the Willard, Ozio, Eleventh, Bar Rouge, Helix, Mandarin Hotel, and Topaz for martinis over Palette.

Palette's restaurant week menu was a good bargain, good choices. Saved probably around $20.

Now the food. The steak wasn't very good. It was rather chewy and fatty. The chicken was excellent and juicy. The sweet potato soup was excellent. The crab cakes were very good - tons of crab, not much filler. Deserts were pretty bad. The chocolate cake was dry and stale. It wasn't sweet enough. The apple tart was dry and burnt. It could have been an apple cracker. The wine was great and priced well. The service was very good and attentive. Our table sucked though and was in the corner and practically on top of the people next to us. We could barely hear ourselves until they left. The cotton candy while waiting for the check was the best part. What a cute idea.

Monday, January 03, 2005

The Bush White House Christmas Tree - a Gay, Pagan Celebration?

While walking around the tree on the ellipse last week, I noticed that there were several large logs burning. According to the sign, they were there to symbolize a "gay festival" back in the times of Thor.

When did the Bush White House begin celebrating gay festivals and pagan Gods??

I'm surprised the Christian Coalition hasn't taken some action by now.

Wednesday, December 29, 2004

Not So Much Solitude

So, I was wrong. Went to see the tree with J tonight and thought we'd go to Old Ebbitt Grill. Man was it packed! Lines of people waiting out the door. So even though 60% of DC is gone, all the tourists are here so good tables without reservations aren't as easy to come by. Don't tourists know they're supposed to come during the summer? Or before/during Christmas? So it's a half-victory. So I get a seat on the metro, but I can't walk down the street without walking into some slow walking tourist who's walking and stopping and talking and staring at a map all at the same time in front of me.